“I love you daddy”

The greatest four words any dad always wants to hear! Since my diagnosis, there have been a lot of little things I have tried to be better at. Putting away my cell phone, especially when spending time with the kids is definitely one I’m still working on improving. One of the other things I have made the conscious decision to do is make sure my family knows just how much I love them. To do that, you have to find ways to show them that love, but you also have to make sure you are telling them how much you love them! So, I have been working to tell both Ethan and Brooks at least 10 times a day that I love them. It might sound excessive, but hey, I decided I wanted to do it and I am sticking to it! Sometimes we have to put those reminders closer together than I would like, but we are continuing to get it done each day!

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The first disconnect day… LGRW!

This year for my birthday, Autumn went above and beyond and got me what I considered a very special present. Tickets to the Red Wings season opener (for those of you non hockey fans, LGRW = Let’s Go Red Wings!). I hadn’t been to the new Little Caesars Arena yet since we were living in Chicago last year when it opened, so this was my first chance to see the new building and cheer the Wings on in their first game as they march to a Stanley Cup Championship this year! Or perhaps a last place finish and the first overall draft pick… We can still hope for the cup at this point though!

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The hardest part of the first day of chemo

The day started at 4:59 with Ethan talking in his sleep. I could clearly hear him over his monitor stating “I want to eat my sandwich at the park Mommy”. I got a good chuckle out of it, but as I tried to fall back asleep, reality was setting in. Even though I am not supposed to lose my hair for this one, all I could picture is myself bald and throwing up for the next six months. The alarm went off at 5:45 which made it more real as we got ready and I ate my scrambled eggs and toast wondering if my taste buds would be all different for every meal for the foreseeable future.

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When a normal Saturday includes an answered prayer

This past Saturday started off like any other normal Saturday. It was about 7:30am, and Brooks, our 8 month old was laying on the ground in the living room laughing while Ethan, our almost three year old danced around above him making faces and sounds. Both were loving it while Autumn and I watched and smiled. Soon Ethan bent down and got real close to Brooks face which always made Brooks laugh the hardest, when it happened. Ethan accidentally let out a long drool which fell directly into Brooks mouth. Both thought it was hilarious and kept their game going like nothing significant just happened while I threw up a little bit in my mouth. Continue reading

The worst day ever… Or was it?

It was March of 2009. I had graduated college about nine months earlier and started working at a company doing aftermarket auto parts sales. Unlike most of my college friends, I actually liked my first job out of school! Things had been going well. We had secured contract extensions for multiple product lines from my biggest customer and had rolled out a new product line as well. I was on a plane flight home from New Orleans where I had just spent three days at a customers show in our booth and came out of it with quite a few good leads for growth. Then, that afternoon, everything got turned upside down.  Continue reading

The bribe and first two steps to recovery

$26. It was all the money I had on me. It also included my lucky $2 that wasn’t feeling so lucky anymore. I am not sure if they have ATM’s in hospitals, but they definitely didn’t on my floor as I had done countless laps walking around in circles there over the previous 24 hours. It was Monday afternoon, I had been in the hospital since Friday and I had just offered every penny on me to the surgeon as long as she promised that no matter what she found in my upcoming colonoscopy, she would agree to discharge me and send me home that afternoon. I could tell it wasn’t quite enough as I slid from the hospital bed to the operating table so I kept pushing. Continue reading